complex

So if you know me you know that unfortunately I do enjoy the occasional reality television. My absolute favorite shows are self help therapy tv shows such as Tough Love and Sex Rehab. I end up tearing up in every episode. But I found that in the most recent episode of Tough Love and last weeks Sex Rehab i was effected the most. I was doing some research in my brain basically and found that I have so much unresolved personal shit. I mean, dont get me wrong, I am the happiest I have ever been in my entire life but I am still realizing all these little things about me. I'm not complaining just noticing. On the most recent episode of Tough Love they did an excercise where they write letters to their fathers and turns out that most of the girls have total daddy complex's weather it be their father is horrible and they are afraid there man will be horrible, their father left so they are afraid their man will leave. It makes me realize that I have a total mother complex. I am not sure if it is normal for a gay male to think of the reason why they are always alone is a mommy complex but it makes so much sense to me, especially now. So I kind of just wanted to write a couple letters maybe to get some stuff off my chest coz apparently it helped these people on the show. The first letter will be to my mother and the second to the man that sexually attacked me when I was 14. And I am already tearing up thinking about writing them, but its something I have never tried so I am just banking on it helping. So here goes...